I’m ready to go home. I’m tired.
I’m tired of seeing the effects of the curse. I’m tired of seeing people sin against God and against others in harmful ways. I’m tired of my own struggle against sin.
I grow weary hearing the latest news. Wars and rumors of wars fill the headlines and burden my soul. Corruption and greed by so-called leaders serving themselves rather than their people exasperates me. Explicit rebellion against God and his beautiful design is celebrated and those who speak against it are mocked.
I groan with creation and long to be fully restored and made new. My longing deepens with the passing of each loved one, each friend. Death takes another, and another, and another and never seems satisfied.
Paul tells us “to live is Christ, and to die is gain” (Phil. 1:21). Whether God gives him another fifty years or just a few more seconds, Paul declares either way a win. To live means to have more opportunity to spread the gospel and minister to others. Death brings the true treasure we all long for: eternity with Christ.
But even Paul seemed to grow tired and long for home: “My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better” (v. 23). Yet he realized that staying was beneficial for others: “But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account” (v. 24). While it was a win-win situation, Paul was still “hard pressed between the two” (v. 23).
However, we don’t get to decide. God has determined our days by fixing both our day of birth and our day of death. For some, he grants long life filled with memories. For others, their day of death seems far too early.
Either way, we rejoice because the grave doesn’t defeat us. Our former unconquerable enemy, death now serves as a hostess taking us to our greatest joy. Therefore believers need not fear death and we’ll receive it willingly when God calls us to it.
But until then, we give ourselves for the good of others and the glory of God. We tell those who don’t know about the beauty of our God and the good news of his gospel. We encourage believers not to give up in doing good, for in due time they will reap if they continue. We worship God even though we only see him dimly and not yet face to face. We live this life not for itself, but as a passing voyage to our true home.
While I continue to grow tired, while I continue to long for home, I’ll strive not to waste a moment God has given me in this life. Then, when my eyes close for the last time, Lord willing I’ll hear the words: “Well done my good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy of your master.”
Come quickly, Lord Jesus.
AMEN!
Thank you. I’m 82. The Lord called my beloved wife home 4 years ago. Your words nourished my weary soul.
I discovered your article on the Aquila Report.
May the Lord richly bless your ministry.